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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24362503">The Night We Took That Year</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmotionalSupportPuma/pseuds/EmotionalSupportPuma'>EmotionalSupportPuma</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Borderlands (Video Games)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Comfort, Developing Friendships, F/F, Fluff, Friendship, Pining, Pre-Relationship, Talking, only slight pining and not from the pov</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 10:15:07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,469</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24362503</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmotionalSupportPuma/pseuds/EmotionalSupportPuma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>As it turned out, becoming a Siren wasn't easy and Tannis had questions with no answers.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lilith/Patricia Tannis</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>19</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Night We Took That Year</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>title is a lyric from the song Black Leaf Falls by sea wolf</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>She didn't expect to ever get such a firsthand experience with Siren powers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tannis was smart as a default, paranoid as a result of trauma, and meticulous to cope with everything else. So, it only made sense that she spent many nights picking over countless scenarios that could happen to her at any given moment. Becoming a Siren had never been one of those scenarios. A pipe dream perhaps, to be able to learn about this phenomenon indefinitely, but never anything more solid than that. Suddenly she didn't find the science behind it quite so alluring.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The minute the powers manifested they overwhelmed her with their eminence. She could feel something wrong deep in her even before the first brilliant, blue tattoo began to trace its way into existence on her skin. Like the moments before an anxiety attack hit; every nerve in her body fidgeting uncomfortably and pushing concise thought from her brain. One moment she was Patricia Tannis, the viciously intelligent scientist, and then she was just...a Siren. Every ounce of what made her </span>
  <em>
    <span>Tannis</span>
  </em>
  <span> had been overlaid by this stark concept. It was sudden and nauseating enough that she nearly fainted. Which was rather surprising, given that her normal panic-responses included vomiting and nosebleeds. Proof that this was something of a whole other caliber.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And, quite frankly, Tannis didn't like it one bit.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn't as though getting the powers hurt, not physically anyways. Her entire equilibrium was thrown off by them. The way they shown gave her a headache, the way they tried to reach out and tap into the electronics around her made her skin itch, and the way she could </span>
  <em>
    <span>feel</span>
  </em>
  <span> them ever present within her left Tannis feeling profoundly distant from her own body. She was no stranger to out-of-body experiences, with dissociative episodes that could be traced back to the minute she'd landed on Pandora, but this was different. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Distinct in its variance. She had tried to keep in depth notes about her experiences for later discussion with Lilith, or even Maya if she could manage it without freaking out. But with every day she had the powers the reactions grew. Tannis woke up nauseous, went through her day with a splitting headache, and retired to bed feeling like her mind had splintered off from the rest of her somewhere during that time. She wanted to know if this was </span>
  <em>
    <span>supposed</span>
  </em>
  <span> to happen. Of the Sirens she knew relatively well, Lilith, Maya and even Angel, they'd all gotten their powers at a young age. She thought Maya might have been born with hers, but couldn't remember for certain and wasn't going to ask until she could do so without bleeding everywhere. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yes, Sirens could choose who to bestow their powers upon after death, but what did that mean for the person who received this gift? Tannis wasn't old and yet, she wasn't quite young either. With a list of the average lifespans of people on Pandora she'd say she was just about middle-aged. Perhaps the strain of being a Siren was easier dealt with when one grew </span>
  <em>
    <span>with</span>
  </em>
  <span> the powers rather than trying to assume them afterwards. There simply wasn't enough data to tell and that was the frustrating part. She wrote everything she experienced down regardless, but it would have been nice to exchange findings with someone else.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As it was, all that Tannis could manage to do was curl up in her cot and try desperately not to vomit for the fourth time that day. Her body seemed to be attempting to eject these powers from itself forcibly. That thought was enough to send her to Lilith, the need to understand what was going on outweighed her aversion to stepping foot outside like this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>___</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Well, what is it you want to know?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilith seemed as though her attention was anywhere except in this tiny room with just the two of them. Sharp, golden eyes traced patterns on the walls, which was the only reason that Tannis could manage to look at them. If they moved to meet hers then she'd switch to staring resolutely into middlespace. When faced with the question, Tannis found that suddenly she wasn't sure </span>
  <em>
    <span>what</span>
  </em>
  <span> she even wanted to know. It had seemed so much simpler in the abstract. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I-you...were you born a Siren?" She asked at last, hating the uncertainty of her voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No." Lilith said to her mild surprise, "But I became one when I was a kid. Three or four, I think, barely able to speak in sentences that made sense."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For a moment Tannis felt the wind leave her sails. Yes, the scholar in her wanted any information on Sirens that she could get, but the part of her that was </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually</span>
  </em>
  <span> a Siren now? It wanted answers and she wasn't sure these would be the ones she needed. Lilith had been so young to get her powers and Tannis...well, there was a stark difference from when she'd gotten hers. The Firehawk had spent her formative years growing </span>
  <em>
    <span>with</span>
  </em>
  <span> her abilities.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a moment Tannis asked quietly, "Did you have the memories?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yep, scared the shit out of my parents. Can you imagine your little three-year-old suddenly talking about her "old life when she was big"?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She couldn't quite imagine being the parent in that scenario, but she could envision Lilith as a child, surprisingly enough. A little spitfire with skills beyond belief to shock those around her. Tannis didn't think the past memories would have been very shocking at all, compared to the </span>
  <em>
    <span>wings</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Perhaps Lilith hadn't been able to produce the wings as a child, though. That was a question to be filed away for later.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because Tannis wasn't a child anymore and, really, the people around her were accustomed to strange ramblings by this point. No one would think twice about it if she started mentioning things that happened in a previous life. When she thought about it, very few of them had known Angel well enough to even realize that was who the memories belonged to, and none of them had known the Sirens to have this power </span>
  <em>
    <span>before</span>
  </em>
  <span> Angel. That was something she noted early on: the snippets she glimpsed were only ever of the Sirens with phaseshift. An interesting, if predictable, development.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before she could reign in her thoughts, Lilith spoke again, "They don't stay, though. Eventually it becomes harder and harder to call them back."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"All of them?" Tannis was startled by the sudden pang of sadness that arose within her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You might recall one once every few...I dunno, years? But never for long and never frequently." After a moment she added, "At least in my experience."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Staring at her hands and the way her fingers twitched with anxiety, she willed Angel's memories to play in the back of her mind. Like someone leaving a television playing while she worked. Images flickered turbulently behind her eyes, so familiar and yet so difficult to focus on. A young girl looking in the mirror, tracing the blue tattoos in wonder as they appeared. Tannis wasn't adept at guessing the ages of humans, but in this memory Angel couldn't have been much older than six. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She carefully shied away from the memories that came after that. Being trapped by Jack was something Tannis had already experienced once and frequently relived in her nightmares, she didn't particularly want to add Angel's memories of being locked away to that mix. At first she hadn't the choice when it came to what she remembered, but now she could begin to compartmentalize which memories surfaced the most vividly. Then there was the surge of happiness when Angel started helping Lilith's band of Vault Hunters. It always rushed in before she could siphon it off, almost too much for Tannis to bear.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilith shifted her head, eyes a scorching beacon that Tannis wanted desperately to avoid. They met for scarcely a second regardless. With her heartbeat pounding in her ears, Tannis returned her attention to her wringing hands. Oh, perhaps that sudden movement was what had caught the other Siren's attention. Either that or the way her knee had started to shake from the overstimulation of the memories. She wished that emotions tied to them were a tad less strong, wondering only idly if they were that strong for Angel at the time or simply exaggerated by the powers they were tied to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What are you seeing?" Lilith asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"The memories." She paused to curb her bluntness, realizing that the question was probably intended to mean more, "Angel's memories. She liked you and the others, way more than I would have thought humanly possible."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"That's called being friends, Tannis."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I do not like it."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Surprisingly, Lilith just shook her head with a snort-like sound that might have been a laugh. Indignation painted Tannis' cheeks dark and she grimaced. She couldn't think of a sufficient response, settling for folding her arms defensively. It had been years and years since </span>
  <em>
    <span>Tannis</span>
  </em>
  <span> had been at a point where she could call someone a friend. Even then, she'd have rather called them colleagues than that. That had been back when she first arrived on Pandora. She couldn't recall feeling anything this strongly for another person except annoyance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the emotions tied to flashing memories remained. Logically she knew that was what they were, but the images of Lilith in her mind's eye and then looking at the physical version of her here was beginning to be disconcerting. Tannis glanced at the other Siren once more and frowned at the pinch in her chest. Was that feeling her own or did it belong to the powers? There was little scientific basis in what was happening to her, so she couldn't be positive either way, and that was deeply disconcerting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Is that all you wanted to talk about?" Lilith asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She wanted to leave, that much was obvious even to Tannis. The two of them weren't particularly close. They certainly weren't friends. Lilith was someone that she had grown to tolerate more frequently than most, but that didn't mean either of them went out of their way to spend time together. And yet...the thought of being left here alone was suddenly a daunting prospect. Tannis didn't want to be stuck in her own head right now, not when she couldn't discern what was </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span> and what </span>
  <em>
    <span>wasn't. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>"No." She spat with a little more force than intended, one hand shaking in the air, "Can you just-...just stay here a moment?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilith recoiled for a moment, but didn't move any further, "Uh, yeah. Sure."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I can't…"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her tongue felt heavier as soon as she even considered what to say next. Emotional vulnerability, it was sickening and juvenile. So unbecoming of someone like her. Tannis snapped her teeth closed, ignoring the pain the force of it caused, and spun around on her heel. There was too much pent up under her skin to stay still. She paced and fretted aloud, under her breath of course. All the while Lilith remained in the doorway. She watched, but didn't interrupt and...she still didn't leave. Eventually Tannis managed to glance her way despite the way it made her stomach flip.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Golden eyes watched her impassively and Tannis had to lower her gaze, the pressure in her sinuses building. To guess what Lilith was thinking would be about as impossible to her as becoming a Siren had seemed long ago. So improbable that it wasn't even worth pondering over. Somewhere deep inside, a tiny inquisitive voice wondered if it </span>
  <em>
    <span>was</span>
  </em>
  <span> possible for her to read another person one day. What would it take to get to that point? Tannis frowned and continued pacing away her agitation. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You alright, killer?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She avoided the question with the grace of a dead skag, "Why do you insist on using that nickname for me as well? I'm not one of your Vault Hunters and I do not kill for a living. Not usually, anyways."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I, uh, " Lilith cocked her head as though she didn't understand the question, "Kinda use it for everybody nowadays. Why, you want a special one?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Of course not."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Oh...do you want me to stop?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tannis surprised herself by answering without hesitation, "No."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She could nearly </span>
  <em>
    <span>feel</span>
  </em>
  <span> the confusion radiating from the other Siren and yet the silence continued on. Any other conversations involving Lilith that she could recall had droned on for ages, she had the tendency to poke and prod verbally. So many questions about why Tannis behaved the way she did, questions about what she'd done that day, just a constant barrage of social commentary. But today Lilith had mostly remained quiet aside from answering Tannis' own queries. She couldn't fathom the reason behind this drastic change.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Are you sick?" She asked bluntly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Not that I'm aware of. Do I, uh, look sick or something?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You are never this quiet."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lilith squinted at her, "Thought you preferred it that way."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I do, but I don't expect that from you." After a moment she added, "Wish perhaps."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Well, I'm not sick. I was trying to- I dunno, make an effort not to drive you crazy. The powers do enough of that in the early days."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Two different trains of thought spurred from that; firstly the wondering why </span>
  <em>
    <span>this </span>
  </em>
  <span>time was different. What was the motive for Lilith to go out of her way to bother her less than usual? But that was quickly overshadowed by the answer to the question Tannis hadn't asked. Was what she felt </span>
  <em>
    <span>normal</span>
  </em>
  <span>? Yes, Lilith smiled at her and put the nagging questions away with one simple sentence. Becoming a Siren was simply an ordeal to endure, the price one had to pay for such abilities, as it were. She couldn't fight off the giddy smile that pulled at her lips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Renewed vigor flooded her veins and she scrambled around for the nearest echo recorder. Lilith continued to sit in the far corner of the room, watching with a smile as well. As Tannis eagerly relayed her findings into the device, she moved closer bit by bit, offering up her own experiences whenever Tannis' train of thought became derailed. In the end they stayed like that for hours, just recording what it was like to be a Siren. Lilith said she'd rope Maya in another day to get her side of things too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tannis stayed awake longer, transcribing some of the more confusing bits for future studying. After a moment she glanced over at Lilith's sleeping form. Slumped over the desk with her head nestled on her arm, she looked quite different than usual. Peaceful, almost. The pinch in her chest returned and for the first time that night Tannis thought she knew exactly who that feeling belonged to.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>As always, all comments and constructive criticism are greatly appreciated and I hope y'all have a good day/night!</p><p>If you wanna see some of my writing before its posted, or just my shitposts, my borderlands tumblr is tannithvibes!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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